Have you ever been at an event, a party, a social occasion, or even introduced to someone by a mutual acquaintance, and the question inevitably comes up: “So, what do you do?” In many situations, the way that question is asked, and the tone with which it is delivered, plus the milieu of connection, demands the response, ” I am a …….doctor, pilot, dentist, engineer, sales rep, …etc.” Have you ever heard someone say, as Robert Fulgham said in his best-selling book, All I Ever Needed to Know I learned in Kindergarten, “ I am a BREATHEUR?” I’ve always wanted to say that myself, as I think it’s really clever and aptly describes what we all DO, that is, we BREATHE. A friend of mine who lived in California noticed the difference in the answer to this question when she moved out to the high-energy, seriously professional, east coast environment. “Here, everyone answers with what their job is, and on the west coast, if you ask a person what they do, they will say, “I surf” or “I garden” or “I ride my bike/motorcyle/rollerblades!” This does beg the followup question, if you are transitioning to your post-career life and you’ve always answered your title, profession, or occupation, as what you do, WHAT WILL YOU SAY, AFTER YOU RETIRE?
It is the serious concern of our time, when one’s life, as it is perceived and valued by our society, is based on our profession rather than who we are as an individual. No wonder the transition to retirement is especially difficult for people who have been held in high esteem because of their position in life and not actually what they’ve DONE. To mitigate the sometimes traumatic and paralyzing effect of this transition or perceived loss of identity, it’s important to be proactively thinking of the answer to this question, “What do you do?” in terms outside of your work role. If you can complete the sentence, ” I am …..” without reference to a job, position, title (including parent and/or grandparent!) you begin to see yourself in terms of who you really are, not just what role you play in a company or firm. It’s a great exercise to really get started on the way you hope and dream the next chapter of your life will go. SURF’S UP!!
Flying Forward in Retirement! 