I’ve alluded to the time-space phenomenon, where in retirement faced with unending time (or at least more than there ever was during the working years), there is an urgency or impetus to fill that time so it provides a feeling of both accomplishment and meaning. To high functioning individuals, many of whom worked long hours and/or intense days and periods of demands of their jobs, this seems ideal! Endless stretches of minutes, hours, days and maybe even weeks to do whatever your heart desires, not on anyone else’s timetable- imagine!
At first, transitioning to retirement appears to be like the longest vacation of your life–motorcycle trips, RV across America, months in Tuscany or endless happy rounds of golf. This looks like the chance to truly operate in a flow kind of way, and immediately this type of lifestyle is considered a much deserved and well needed respite from the life left behind at work.
However, even with fantastic flow, for most people coming off a career of requirements that existed in a calendar or daily agenda, the loss of the structure of your days can be quite discombobulating. It harkens to the teen/youth years when a series of snow days or the first week of summer vacation allow you to stay up as late as you want, sleep in or wear pajamas all day if you want, with nowhere to go, nothing to do. Eventually, even this pleasure and lack of routine becomes a drag, with boredom or restlessness setting in. Becky Kueker wrote Hiding in My Pajamas, addressing this challenge retirees face, particularly in the first two years after leaving their job, uniform and work-face behind.
There is an inherent lack of structure in you days, post-career, unless you proactively create it. The wonderful thing about this is that you are the architect and can design your days, months, and years to best fit your own needs and personal make-up of rewards you seek. Are they social? Financial? Contribution? Status? An honest self-inventory and projection of what you want out of life is useful in applying a framework to the use of your time in retirement.
It isn’t the immediate time after retirement (the “honeymoon”) but the 20-30 years that requires some thought. My neighbors and parents, who retired at different stages of life have demonstrated what works for each of them in their current situation, 10-20 years post-work. One couple takes classes regularly at the OLLI (Osher Lifelong Learning Institute), relating to the travel they aspire to and do. They also connect routinely, as a couple and individually, with friends for lunch, dinner and other activities. My parents and other neighbors regularly volunteer at their favorite organizations and have that as scheduled events on their calendar, committing to a specific time and place. All six of these retirees incorporate exercise into their schedules, daily, be it a class or a walk.
To find the rhythm of your days is a real gift, but in retirement it is essential to a happy and fruitful existence. The structure of your daily life should suit you and meet your personal needs, everyday but especially post-career.
” How you order your days is how you live your life.”- Louise Hay
If you want input in how to create your daily structure in retirement, contact me at mary@flyingforwardinretirement.com
Flying Forward in Retirement! 